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Just cycled back from caroling, washed up and sitting down to write a couple more cards. Was singing “Go tell it on the mountain” when I thought about the meaning of the carol. Honestly I haven’t sat down to appreciate Christmas, each year it rushes by. We go for caroling, baptism, then settle down and do our own things. And then a few days of relaxing and off to another madcap year. Shall finish a few cards up for tomorrow. Goodness, this year I wrote so few but I made them so it slightly more time than normal. I guess I just didn’t sit down and focus thats why.

Hannah seems to be bawling non-stop. I think its quite.. interesting to have a baby. Even with a mom living upstairs I’ still unfazed. I guess its cos I’m not going to be the one giving birth and feeding every 2 hours (though if i could i would..) hmmm.. imagine, Jesus as a baby THAT tiny. I mean.. God would actually stoop down soooooo low just to save us. He was willing to become so weak just for us.  Ah… I’m desperate, but obviously not enough.

Hi darren, If you’re reading this I thought of you and called you but you didn’t pick up. Pick up next time leh. haha..

I wanted to leave it as that but I feel that would be a totally unedifying attention seeking pointless sharing of a fact. Still.. sometimes, less is more. I just feel nothing about that la. Sorta reminds me of the time I was talking to David in the loo at BCM after a sermon.

YH: Eh, I feel nothing leh

David: wah.. dude, the sermons are power leh..

YH: I know.

David: Wah, you got something wrong man.

YH: lol..

That time, I know that the sermons were just.. not meant for me. Others really really did to the point that I wanted to jump out of my chair for invitation.. just waiting to go up out to kneel at the alter. This time I recognize it is only my heart that is cold and nothing else is the reason.

I’m off to bed. Was so tiring cleaning 3 rooms. Sandra came over at 2 or 3 to wash up after meeting Mabel and hung around until 6 cos got caroling at tampines. So, I made her useful by carrying stuff down from my sister’s room to mine.

Hai, now to pack my room..

Just follow me…

YH

Definitions of Hannah on the Web:

Okay, so thats that.

At 0613hrs I was napping after a long session on the PS2 at Darren’s place when I got a message from my mom saying my sister was in labour. I messaged back and asked what I should do.. ahha.. anyway, I went for soccer, breakfast and went home to put back the van before I went out to Mount Elizabeth hospital. I missed the moment which she delivered cos after that crazy long tired drive I conked out on my bed for about half an hour and got there slightly late. Here are the pictures of the day. Some of them my mom’s the others are mine

I’ve been overloaded with things to think about in the past 24hours. I stayed over at darren’s place last night and we spent the time playing metal slug, marvel vs. capcom, talking, slacking around. I had a nice time with him. Its the kind of bond that doesn’t make sense. I understand him to a certain degree which is interesting considering how different we are in background. I can say for sure we are almost totally synced in regards to humor. We didn’t sleep at all then we went for breakfast at tiong barhu and then soccer.

Soccer ended prematurely cos of mud and rain.. so we (ps amos buck’s family me darren benji) carried on to tiong barhu market to eat and spend time together.

Back to the tons of things presented to me today in no particular order:

• It just feels weird to try and dispense an opinion without perfect knowledge of a matter at hand. Notice “perfect” because if not, wouldn’t the opinion be baseless? or rather have a weak foundation? and even with perfect knowledge of the matter, our (un)discerning mind wouldn’t be able to analyse it properly anyway.
• Not all things are revealed to us, so why bother! haha.. don’t think unnecessarily about things which you have no knowledge about and are expressly not revealed like “is there life on other planets?” you get the picture.
• Appalling also, is the idea that people regard their opinion to be the largest/most important/most smart in speech! I think its semi acceptable and natural for a person to say that his opinion doesn’t matter and then his actions say otherwise. But to say “Don’t listen to ppl, listen to me.. lol..” is kinda farfetched even to me. Maybe it was said in jest but still.. haha.. I mean.. I said it in jest to juxtapose the practicality of getting more opinions, but I don’t think the others did.
• The idea of friendships and how its become an investment scheme to put it crudely. Its a gross insult to the concept of love and friendship to expect or rather, demand reciprocation and to guilt people into your selfish emotional needs. You don’t choose your friends, friends choose you, friends are your friends because of what you are. Friends are a reflection of the inner you. Don’t say “my this bunch of church friends rejected me so I go with this bunch of world ones”. It is true they reject you but only because of what you are, not because they purposely don’t like you (I hope). Its not the friends that make the man, but the man that makes the friends. In similar fashion, its not what goes into the body that defiles but what comes out.
• The idea of in-laws and how they become out-laws. Difference in opinions and how everyone thinks their opinion is the biggest (again). Ignorance as the root of abhorrance if theres such a word
• The idea of upbringing and how 2nd generation will follow in the footsteps of first gen. If gen 1 never gets past the mundane quarrels and disunity, expect the next gen to do the same. I see the next generation having fewer disputes and “reaching” the maturity “level” I only had many years after them. How my willingness to exercise grace enabled them to follow and how a young man showed me grace when I didn’t. Its all really related. Our church will never move if the previous generation doesn’t follow Godly principles. Its like some scientist said we are able to come so far only cos we stand on the shoulders of giants that went before us.
• Lastly, I’m feeling off balance abit. The lyrics “Lord I need you.. when the sea of life is calm..” come to mind. After the crazy stuff we went through for cantata it suddenly ceased and died down already.. a false sense of peacefulness sweeps over me. This battle is over but the war wages on. Sigh.

Yep.. some of the things passing through my mind today.

Thanksgiving for the day: For safety as I drove home. I was tired beyond what I was able to stand and I managed to drive all the way back home. I was talking to my self, shouting, singing, listening to music really loud, winding down the windows(this helped alot). It was a crazy 30min. I was really so scared I would fall asleep and I did find my eyes shutting by themselves. I’ll never do this again.

I made a bag! Spent about an hour tops. For smelly clothes and wet stuff. Its totally waterproof material and has a roll-top so it stays that way. Only problem is the vinyl is too thick, doesn’t fold properly. I made it for David (Tan). I shall give it to him tomorrow so he can keep his stuff after soccer. He’s been real nice to my sister, speaking of which, she will be inducing on 21st if nothing happens by then. I shall be off to fetch YX and her family home! After which I will go to Darren’s place and spend the night swapping stories and baking cookies. Morning we will fetch Brian and Nick, then head for gan eng seng to play soccer. Lunch will be at tung lok and I shall give kayaking a miss. Shall go with the guys again another day!

Whats “DC” you say? direct current? ahha.. no la, Dirty Clothes la..

5 down, 10 to go!

0930-1200: Breakfast and other stuff with William. Grabbed his bike and lent him my c5050
1200-1400: Clean out the church van
1400-1600: Still cleaning out the church van and went Ikea for some stuff
1700-2030: Dinner at Changi Village with my dad then headed to airport
2030-2230: Sent William and Alodie off
2230-0040: Stone and upload photos

Oh man! I took like.. 2 hours plus to get up to speed for 3 cards. I shall be scaling down my ambitions. haha.. Still, I’ll be going to try to do as many as I can. I think I’m kinda long past the age for making stuff. I used to make so many stuff. Now simple cards make until wanna die. I’m tired so I’m going to sleep now.

I made a new set, just for people portraits. Think this is the beginning of something nice. haha..